At Knick Knack in Polderslaughter the Baroness came to play
She faced the whole Dutch Army, A Fat Guy armed with a glaive
She also faced some treason, but not from Dutch I'm glad to say
No, she also faced a member of her own Guard, truly a treacherous knave!

Off the field she is quite fluffy
Just as feminine as she can be
But on the field she destroys armies
It's a wondrous sight to see

With righteous determination, she pummeled that treasonous guard
And by the time that she was done, all that was left was a pile of lard
But the Dutch army was made of sterner stuff, he fought well with his glaive
And there were many double kills, from battles both fierce and brave

Off the field she is quite fluffy
Just as feminine as she can be
But on the field she destroys armies
It's a wondrous sight to see

Since the Baron could not make the trip, she fought for an Honorable Lord
And Goetz was so inspiring, she managed to out-do the Dutch horde
And as for her treacherous guardsman, that she left laying on the floor
His penance was to write this ballad, I hope this evens the score?

Off the field she is quite fluffy
Just as feminine as she can be
But on the field she destroys armies
It's a wondrous sight to see

In the Netherlands, they have many talented people who play in the SCA as archers, fencers, minstrels, artisans and officers. But there is only one heavy fighter, who also happens to be a Fat Guy (Floris) . We refer to him as the Dutch Army. The Knick Knack Tournament was held the same weekend as the German elections. So very few people from Germany Attended. Those who did were mostly Americans. To the North in Sweden there was another event, so none of their fighters came down. It was still a fine event, but only three heavy weapons fighters came with armor. Myself, Baroness Sylwien, and the Dutch Army. The Tournament was still held and we had fun. When It was announced that Baroness Sylwein won, Lord John Called out "All Hail Baroness Sylwein, Destroyer of Armies". I had two fighting tabards with me. My Fat Guy Tabard and My Baronial Tabard. Floris put on his Fat Guy Tabard and the Baroness put on her Baronial Tabard. Talk about a conflict!. I ended up fighting with my Fat Guy Tabard(it had a pocket for my cigarettes), thus the treachery. Fluffy is how the Baroness describes her persona.